Posted by: Farrah
I wish that I was worthy of the rosy picture Greg painted in his testimony. I wish I could say that I was a perfect Christian, but that is not the case. It would have been best if my husband had been my first date. He can say his wife (me) was his first kiss, but I was not so noble. I tried very hard to mess up God’s plans. As sincere and devoted as I was to my faith, it seemed I could not master the temptation of dating the wrong men.
Thankfully, God was merciful and intervened. One lost interest, one had a heart attack and returned to his Arab country from where he basically proposed. His family was wealthy, and I think he would have flown me across the world. Praise God, I came to my senses! To think I might have ended up trapped in a land where women are slaves to their husbands! The third terminated our relationship after finding a girl who had no limitations. He was in jail for rape by the time I married Greg.
That last one was rough, because it ended in real heartbreak. The kind of heartbreak that makes you want to die. I cried every day for weeks and begged God several times a day to take away the pain. I remember my mom sitting on my bed saying, “You don’t know what could happen. God could bring you the perfect Christian guy. A year from now you could be married!”
It seemed impossible. I laughed through my tears though there was a glimmer of hope. God is mighty, and He does big things.
I barely knew Greg. I have a vivid memory of sitting in the same computer lab doing homework. I was studying at a table, while he was writing a program. Apparently it wasn’t going well, and he was cussing like a sailor. Hardcore, offensive profanity. I thought, “I could never marry a heathen like that.” No joke!
Not only that, but I liked clean cut. He had a ponytail. I noticed eyes, he wore glasses. His pants and shirts were too short. Seriously, his pants were several inches above his ankles. I was surprised when he walked into the room one day with new clothes and contacts! I thought, “Wow! He’s actually attractive when he doesn’t look like a geek!" We enjoyed chatting now and then. Once he impressed me with his kindness and patience when he took the time to teach me three different ways to do matrices on my calculator.
After my horrible heartbreak I prayed and made a strong commitment to God that I would never date again unless the man loved Jesus as much as I did. One day, I got an e-mail from Greg out of the blue. I had asked him to e-mail me during a casual conversation the previous year before he went off to grad school. “Send me an e-mail when you get there.” and he took me seriously. It’s funny, I don’t even remember that conversation!
What a nice e-mail it was! Well written and overflowing with his amazing sense of humor. I looked forward to receiving more letters from this new friend. It would be a fun and refreshing break from the monotony of school.
But I was cautious. I knew my weakness and was determined to keep my commitment to God. I knew I couldn’t trust myself if I spent time with a guy, so I did everything I could to guard against romance. The first time he came back to visit his parents for vacation and wanted to get together, I warned him, “This is JUST friendship. It’s NOT a date.” Poor guy! He had never even kissed a girl, and after hearing THAT, he was scared to try anything! He was a perfect gentleman.
We went to a restaurant, and I prayed before we ate. Afterwards, he looked me straight in the eye and said, “Farrah, that was really beautiful.” There was no hint of mockery. He was completely serious, and I was floored at this incredible, rare display of sincerity. I knew that Greg wasn’t a Christian, but he was real. In fact, that was one of the things that struck my family when they eventually met him: His sincerity.
I have little else to add beyond what Greg said. I shared my faith with him, and we fell in love over time through e-mail. I was worried about what would happen. I was extremely distraught when we had to end our friendship. It was heartbreak city all over, but this time I was confused. “Why God? WHY? I don’t understand how this happened again! I tried SO hard to do the right thing this time! I will just have to trust that You know what You’re doing.”
But it wasn’t a week later before Greg told me that he realized he was giving up not just me but God and asked me to teach him more about Jesus. I had renewed hope. The day he told me he got saved was one of the happiest days of my life!
Something different with my relationship with Greg is that I experienced the full joy of being in love after he became a Christian. It was the first time I walked around with a silly grin all the time and told everyone I met that I was so happy I couldn’t contain it. It felt right, because it WAS right. He was the one God created for me. And you know what? It probably was just about a year after that conversation with my mom that Greg and I were united in marriage. Our Lord is amazing!
This Is It - I've been away from blogging for almost all of 2011, mostly busy with work and trying to launch my own software business. When the renewal for www.JesusAn...
1 year ago